Summer is almost over, so you need to make the most of these next few weeks. Time to find that one friend who owns a boat so you can go tubing!
What is it about tubing that beachgoers love so much? Is it the speed? The water? Maybe it’s their bodies being violently jolted while they’re pulled behind a speedboat easily clocking 30 miles per hour. What a rush, right? Let’s ponder what goes on in your mind when tubing:
1. How am I going to get onto this tube?
Somebody give me a boost! Oh wait, it’s just me. This is awkward.
2. All right, I’m up. Now what do I hold on to?
What’s my best option here so I don’t get tossed out of this thing? I think I’ll go belly down. There’s no way they’ve only given me these itty-bitty handles. Is there a seat belt? Nope, the boat is already moving. This must be it.
3. This isn’t so bad.
It’s like I’m floating in a pool. Except it’s not relaxing. And it kind of hurts. And we’re going faster.
4. This is actually bad.
This is nothing like floating in a pool. I regret every decision I’ve ever made.
5. What happened to my bathing suit?
Did I just lose my suit? Oh never mind, I’m good — the colossal amount of water that’s punching my entire body is only making me feel like my swimsuit was ripped off.
6. Was that my foot I just saw?
Yup. My feet literally just came up over my head and hit me in the face. A tubing scorpion.
7. Where are these waves coming from?
I. Ouch! Can’t. Stop. Ouch! Bouncing. Why are they doing this to me?
8. I’m flying!
I’m catching some air! This is so awes… Wait. No. Slow down! I don’t think I can hold on any longer! Do I hang on and risk being tossed around more? Do I let go and sacrifice myself to the waves?
9. I fell off.
There are no words. Just pain.
10. Who’s next?
That was so much fun! Let me drive the boat; I’ll pull you around the lake nice and slow!